Feb. 18, 2026

Ayahuasca Part 2: Ego Death, Healing Trauma & The Night I Realized I Was Dying While Helping Everyone Else

Ayahuasca Part 2: Ego Death, Healing Trauma & The Night I Realized I Was Dying While Helping Everyone Else
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Apple Podcasts podcast player iconSpotify podcast player icon

In Part 2 of my ayahuasca experience in Costa Rica, we go deeper.

If you haven’t listened to Part 1, go back and start there. This episode covers Night 2 and Night 3 of ceremony — the nights that completely changed how I see myself, my purpose, and my past.

This is where things got real.

In this episode, I share:

  • What happened when I started “helping” everyone else during ceremony — and watched myself die piece by piece

  • The powerful message I received about martyrdom, self-sacrifice, and why helping from an empty cup will destroy you

  • The moment the shamans told me, “That’s how you know you’re a healer.”

  • Why Night 3 (Feminine Night) broke me open in a way I never expected

  • The 3-hour emotional release that felt like decades of suppressed grief leaving my body

  • What it was like to revisit childhood trauma without reliving it

  • The moment I finally received clarity about my past and why that closure mattered

  • How physical purging connected directly to emotional release

  • Why integration matters more than the ceremony itself

This episode is raw. It’s vulnerable. And for some, it may feel confronting.

I am not advocating for plant medicine. I’m sharing my lived experience — what it taught me, what it showed me, and how it reshaped my understanding of healing.

One of the biggest realizations from Night 2:
You cannot save everyone while abandoning yourself.
It will cost you more than you think.

And from Night 3:
Closure doesn’t always come from forgetting.
Sometimes it comes from finally seeing the truth without fear.

If you’ve ever:

  • Struggled with putting yourself last

  • Felt called to healing work but doubted yourself

  • Carried trauma you thought you already “worked through”

  • Or wondered what ego death and deep emotional release actually feel like

This episode will resonate.

Part 3 (Night 4 + Long-Term Integration) is coming next — where I share what actually stuck two years later and how this experience changed the trajectory of my life.

If this episode speaks to you, send me a DM on Instagram: @ownyourshift_kim
I would love to hear your thoughts or your experience.

Until next time — keep owning your shift.